I don’t have much time to read anymore. I used to be able to read 1-2 books per week along with a few magazines that I subscribe to. Unfortunately, the only reading time I get now is on my commute to work which is generally about half-an-hour on the subway; I currently have huge piles of magazines on my desk that I’ve fallen behind on reading. So, the other day I was reading Glamour Magazine on the train and just to give you an idea of how far behind I am in my reading, it was the April issue (which comes out in March) and I was reading it in September. Yeah, I’m not exactly loaded up with tons of free time lately.
Anyway, there was an article in there titled, “I Wish My Sex Life Were More _________!” This article had different words to fill in that blank (“fun!”; “steamy!”; “varied!”…you get the idea) and ideas in which to remedy that particluar wish. This is the part that caught my eye:
It’s a refrain our sexperts often hear from married couples and working couples and, well all couples these days: When did life get so busy and sex get so…scheduled? “If we don’t plan it, it won’t ever happen,” laments Ann, 34, who has a two-year old, two dogs and a husband who works from home.
Dunas says it’s not the planning, per se, that makes things dull but the predictability-only on Wednesday, only after the kids are in bed, missionary, done. Look at your sex life as a “home improvement project,” and put it at the top of your weekend to-do list: Dunas suggests that instead of a Saturday night out, you crash early, relax all morning, read the paper, nap for an hour-and then fool around all afternoon.
Now, I’m not going to discuss the details of my sex life because that’s just nobody’s business but mine and my husband’s. I will say, however, that life with a toddler certainly changes things and makes spontaneity a bit more of a (understatement alert!) challenge. So, I can definitely appreciate tips on how to keep that aspect of our life going along smoothly. But this person’s advice to the mother of a 2-year-old to “relax all morning, read the paper, nap for an hour-and then fool around all afternoon”? Seriously? Does this person even understand what life with a toddler is like? There is no more relaxing all m0rning unless your idea of relaxing is chasing the kid around all morning cleaning up spilled milk, bits of cereal and toys that have been thrown everywhere. There is no more reading the paper unless your idea of reading the paper is having the kid grab it from you every other minute and try to cram it into her mouth. There is no more napping for an hour unless you’re napping while the kid naps – that is, if she decides to gift you with a nap that day. And believe me, there is definitely no more fooling around all afternoon. Period.
Maybe I’m doing something wrong here? Are other parents able to manage their time in a way that I just haven’t figured out yet? (Heck, I can’t even seem to find time to blog most days. I always think I’m going to do at least 3-4 posts a week only to realize that it’s been 2 weeks since my last post and I still can’t squeeze out an extra 15 minutes to do one. Ah,but I have good intentions…)
If anybody has any secrets on finding a way to relax all morning, nap for an hour and fool around all afternoon all while trying to take care of a 16-month-old, PLEASE let me know!